Ok, so today is one of “those” days so far. It all started when I went to bed nice and early last night. You know, to be sure I would get enough sleep for the dreaded Monday-dragon. So, my alarm goes off at 0645 after I finally drifted off to sleep at 0500. ::sigh:: Rush out the door. I forget my lunch.. You know, because that’s what I do on Monday. That’s ok, I was smart enough to pick up some small change for a breakfast and lunch if I want. On my way to Spacely I hit literally EVERY damn red light. This just doesn’t usually happen on early Saturday morning! Yes, today is Saturday, but since I’m the FNG at work, it’s also my Monday. Try and keep up. :) So, anyway, every damn red light! This only happens when the karma gods are actively taking a fuming, nut-ridden shit on you. So, I get to my favorite stop for breakfast, Jack in the Crack.

“One jumbo jack, with no onions and no tomatos, please,” I say to the underpaid whiney clerk. Yes I understand that his day is likely far worse than mine, but this is about me now isn’t it? :)

Arrive at work with only minutes to spare. I head in the side door. This is the elite entry way for special folks like me. :) Though this glorious morning it has 52 thousand fucking desk chairs stacked in it! Fuck! So I head ALL THE WAY around the fuckin building to the front damn door. Make it just in time to clock in and sit down to enjoy my breakfast. :) HA! Not likely. Bite into a nice tomato with a generous helping of god damn onions! So, after I choke down the vomit bubbling up from my stomach, I go to grab some water to chase down the vile substance. My damn glass is empty! OF COURSE IT IS!

Things finally settle down a bit and I get to work. Only to be attacked with a slew of “While I got ya” problems. And my last problem before writing this entry was the infamous “My computer won’t turn on” problem. Easily solved by PLUGGING the fucker in to the wall! Oh the humanity! Though I must admit, those are my favorite. I get to use my best Jimmy Two-Tooth accent and tell them all about E-lec-tricity. :)