For the love of Sweet Baby Jesus can we just let evolution take its course?

This just in: Complete Idiot Almost “Dies” After Eating Cheese from McDonald’s. In his defense, apparently everyone on his planet is allergic to this strange Earth substance known as cheese. Being the hyper picky foodie that I am, I can understand this fool’s plight. Especially when you go to a fast food joint. You tell them no onions! You tell them AGAIN NO FREAKIN ONIONS! Then you look at the sandwich and WTF is that? ONIONS! My god, it pisses you off to no end. But, you know what? I know that I have a distaste for onions, so I check my freakin burger, because it’s an unpleasant experience to bite into an onion.

Now, let’s check check out this Rocket Surgeon’s train of thought…

Wow! I’m hungry. I think I’ll go to McDonald’s for two QPs! I should, however, note that I am allergic to cheese. In fact I could DIE if I eat cheese. So, I will be sure to tell the underpaid, doesn’t-give-a-crap-about-me, burger flipper that I can’t have cheese. I will in fact be sure to tell the order taker, the payment taker, and the server the same thing. Surely then, it will not have the deadly cheese substance on it — because it can cause me to DIE!! Next, I will take my QPs to a darkened room, and proceed to immediately shove them into my mouth. I won’t check them for cheese, because I don’t have time to look for the bright, unnatural, yellow color melted all over my hamburger. I MEAN CHEESE IS SO HARD TO SEE!!! AND I TOLD THEM FIVE TIMES!! … … OMG I’M DYING!

That’s it in a nutshell (no pun intended). This guy’s family decides to speed him to the emergency room (since he’s dying). After the hospital “saves his life” (the $700 bill is telltale of the heroic effort it required), this smacktard and his super genius family are now suing McDonald’s.

So, in conclusion, how did this suit even get past the hysterical laughter of the judge? I mean, for christ sake, I check my burgers like I were looking for the black plague, and all I do is vomit if I eat an onion. This guy could DIE, and he doesn’t check for CHEESE!? Have you ever tried to find a lone McDonald’s onion on a QP!? Ugh…

Well, things are things… Mom is off to Germany for a vacation… Yes, my mom. Yes, an actual vacation… Yes, she’s ok. :) I received word that she made it just fine. Unfortunately, I missed her call, and I don’t have the email address to get a note off to her. So, mom, if you are reading this, I miss you and am so glad you made it ok. You sounded pretty good in your message, so I’m very glad you seem to be relaxing!!

In other news, Heidi and I finished some long needed house repairs this weekend. What a difference it makes. My god. Why am I so adverse to doing house repairs!? It’s not like it was difficult… Sheesh.

Other than that, everything is about the same in Crazy Town. No news is good news right? … Right?

Ugh… I joined Facebook. Thanks a lot, Ki!! Like I need another friggin social network to maintain. So, anyway, any of you readers on Facebook, add me up so I don’t feel so lonely.

Here’s another product review. Heidi and I went to Target to buy some stuff, she left me alone in the car accessories section, which if you know me, can be a bad move. I love car accessories. My steering wheel is crap thanks to the Tucson sun. I figured I’d better get some kind of steering wheel cover to make things better.

I found one. It was soft, nondescript, and a perfect addition to my vehicle. So, I bought it. When I was getting ready to install it, I came across the “Warnings” section… Here’s what I found, “WARNING: The use of this product is likely to cause exposure to chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer, and birth defects or other reproductive harm.”

Let’s examine that statement. I found it interesting that they use the language “likely” instead of “may”. They are basically saying, “Yeah, it’s going to be a surprise if you don’t come into contact with chemicals that cause cancer.” Why is this ok?

So, that got me thinking a bit more. I noticed it was made in China. Yep, my peeps. The up and coming superpower of the world. I’m certain I’m off base, but is it conceivable that China could be waging war against us via products? LOL Maybe they are introducing cancer causing agents into all our products, and shipping bad food to our country in an effort to wage war without bombs? LOL God knows we’d be stupid enough to allow it to happen. Oh, and just for the record, I make this observation with a healthy helping of humor, and only a pinch of seriousness… But, again, you have to wonder!! LOL I’m calling it the Warm War.

I just recently got my hands on a Garmin StreetPilot c330. I must say it’s quite a nifty little device, and I can wait to use it on our next trip on the road.

It’s a great piece of hardware and I’m not really here to review it. I just wanted to share a bit out of the literature that came with it. Of course, it’s something from the “Warning” section. It states, “This product should not be used to determine ground proximity for aircraft.”
Wow. Thanks for that, Garmin!!

Recently Heidi got back on track with the whole eating better, healthy, animal rights, hug a tree, hippy train. I applaud her willpower and conviction to it. I especially give her credit for not being a preachy veggiehead who you just want to slap around with a beef stick — thanks for that honey.

One of the byproducts of her going on this stand against evolution is that I get caught up in the whole eating better thing. It’s not a bad thing by any means. I don’t think anyone would argue that I could stand to benefit from a better diet. It just makes me realize a few things. Especially since her new passion (well, rekindled old passion, perhaps) is much farther reaching than just not eating meat. She’s not a vegan, so she still eats cheese, eggs, etc… She steers away from anything that contains animals in the product. I tried to argue the whole eggs are the chicken, thing, but the old chicken before the egg dilemma came up, and I lost interest.

Anyway, to the point! She’s changing out many of our products to comply with these standards. Now, I don’t hate animals. I just happen to think they are quite tasty when dropped into some searing hot peanut oil. I don’t condone animal abuse, or cruel living conditions — even if they are food. So, I guess, I’m on an organic kick. The way I understand it is organic food is treated better and not pumped with hormones, preservatives and other whatnots. I care not to get into it deeper than that.

What I’ve come to discover is, you don’t know what you got till it’s gone!! Like preservatives! What a difference they make! Organic hotdogs have to practically be flash frozen if you want to keep them for more than a nanosecond. My organic half and half spoiled before the due date (which in itself was only a few days off the purchase date). The hot dogs are fine. I mean, we try to steer clear of hot dogs in general. But, we have a three year old, and sometimes you just opt for easy. But, I think I’m going to have to say I like preservatives in my dairy products. Not all modern advances (additives) are bad! I think some preservatives are actually animal based, tho. Which *I* don’t have a problem with. But, a certain redhead I know does… :-P